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| Happy Turkey Day From Abigail! |
So I spent 3.5 days in the hospital getting 3000mg of Solu-Medrol & a Prednisone pack in my system. They drew blood 3 times a day, leaving my arms scattered with hideous bruises, they injected stuff into my stomach to prevent clots, and told me I was the least demanding patient they had. They told me to get lots of rest, but then woke me up every couple hours to poke and prod me for one reason or another. The doctor said that I was showing some improvement, but of course I wanted more. Monday I had my lumbar puncture. I was really nervous about getting a headache from it, but my family brought me a giant iced coffee and I spent a few hours lying down, and thankfully I was ok. Tuesday I was discharged. At that point I was still limping/hobbling a good bit and was pretty unsteady on my feet. I could sort of wiggle the fingers in my right hand, but it was still really stiff and even getting dressed was a chore.
It was good to be home, in a way I think getting back into the routine that probably made you sick to begin with, also helps to heal you when you have been away from it for a few days. We left the hospital and I went straight home to return the dozen plus customer calls I had waiting for me. After that we all went for a drive to get some new lightweight sneakers for me that had good support and would make it easier for me to walk. (I have to say, they made all the difference in the world. Just trying them on my limp improved drastically!) and then my mom took us to Babies R Us where she bought us the baby monitor we have been wanting for Abigail's room. (Thanks Mom!). By the end of the day I was pretty sore and exhausted.
Wednesday I woke at 8:00 to watch my mom change and dress Abigail--something my fingers would still not allow me to do myself. By 10:00 when Abigail went down for her nap, so did I. I am not a big napper...never have been. I go from when I wake up in the AM until bedtime, no matter how little sleep I had gotten. But I was so drained I couldn't stay awake. That got me down a little because I hate not getting the things done that I need to, when I want to. But after an hour or so nap, I felt better and was able to continue about my day. My mom and I got to cleaning the house and getting food together for Thanksgiving. By the end of this day, I was looking forward to the Thanksgiving I thought I would be dreading just a few days earlier.
Yesterday, Thanksgiving, was a wonderful day full of good food and good people. I really am more thankful than I ever thought about before. I have a wonderful support system of awesome family and friends and they really are my best medicine. I couldn't have had such a wonderful day without everyone's help. From my family and friends that spent the day with me and helped me cook and clean when I couldn't, to everyone's thoughts and prayers, you all have truly helped me start my journey to recovery.
I still haven't gotten used to the slowing down lifestyle- and maybe never will, but I am doing the best that I can right now. Yesterday was a good day, I pushed myself all day and didn't sit down (except to eat) from 8:30 am until about 9:30 pm. I know that I keep saying this, but I really do want to thank everyone. There were some days where even though I was doing my darndest to stay positive, I really did get pretty upset wondering why this had to happen to me so young and how upsetting it was that I couldn't carry or even dress my own daughter. And at times, it was hard to be happy with the little things like tying my own shoes.
TODAY: I am happy to announce, that this morning I carried Abigail to her changing table, undressed her, changed her diaper, and got her dressed, all by myself! (That's me being happy with the little things) :) It wasn't easy and it took about 20 minutes, but I would have spent an hour doing it just to say I had done it. The symptoms that I still have are: Numbness/abnormal sensation over most of my body, Left arm still tingly making some fine motor skills difficult. Knee joints really stiff and numb, making it difficult to bend or kneel. Back numb and hypersensitive, feeling like I have a thousand bruises. Right arm still numb without much motor skill function--but I am extremely happy to say that I can straighten them almost back to normal and can wiggle 4 of the 5 fingers individually AND, I have even been forcing my hand to type a few keys during this blog. It's not always accurate and sometimes lingers on a key too long putting several of the same letter down, but its a start and is WAY better than I could even do yesterday. I still cannot drive and that may be a while still which is pretty upsetting, but I am trying to get used to it. The worst symptom I still have is the MS "Hug"...a name that a very cruel and unfunny person had to come up with because I like hugs, but not this one! It feels like someone is squeezing you so tight around your midsection. Or like you are wearing a belly band that is 12 sizes too small. Your ribs feel like they don't fit. It is a very strange and extremely uncomfortable feeling. It gets worse as the day progresses and usually makes it difficult to fall asleep. It's tough to turn, and I can only lay on my back. I'm trying to pretend its like being pregnant when your belly is huge and tight, It feels a million times worse, but at least imagining it being a baby is a nicer visual than your immune system eating away at a nerve on your spine that causes this. lol My limp is hardly noticeable now, and once I regain full strength (or as close as possible) in my arms, I really will be one happy mama!
It truly is amazing how fast this whole process of getting sick and getting diagnosed and getting on the road to recovery has happened. I am looking forward to getting my injectables (I must really be sick!) so that I can hopefully prevent an exacerbation this serious in the future.
On a side note, I want to send an extra thank you out to my hubby and my mom for doing a successful job as "The blind leading the blind" and taking care of the baby and house when I couldn't. You did a good job. Thank you mom for dropping everything to come help us, I guess I really did need my mom for a while. :) You are released to go home--but not until after the weekend, we may need to hit some sales this weekend! :) Thank you dad and Nicki for letting me steal her for a week, and keep her for Thanksgiving, it was a huge help and made me really happy.
Each day is a baby step closer to getting better. And everything I struggle with helps me to appreciate the little things. I know this is a lifelong disease, but I plan on letting it control as little of my life as possible. I am so glad that I am starting to feel better and am getting used to dealing with the other symptoms because I have a whole life I want to live and nothing is going to get in my way!
Prayers and hugs
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